Day 30: Light In The Darkness
I remember a day when I was going about my day
PRAISING GOD,
SEEING HIM
in
ALL THINGS.
And then...
IT HAPPENED.
Something
TRIGGERED
a memory,
and suddenly it felt as if the sky were falling.
Nothing had actually happened in that moment.
Nothing around me had changed.
But something had changed
IN MY MIND.
I began remembering what I didn't have and forgetting
WHO I DID HAVE.
Have you ever been there?
One moment,
THE JOY OF THE LORD
is your strength.
THE PEACE OF GOD
is transcending all understanding.
HOPE is overflowing.
And then...
it feels as if someone turns out
THE LIGHTS.
You know where the light switch is.
You know
THE LIGHT
is there.
But somehow you find yourself sitting in the
DARKNESS.
That's where I found myself that day.
The battle in my mind was fierce.
It felt as if everything
I BELIEVED
had suddenly disappeared.
Where was GOD?
Where was JESUS?
The old
HURT PLACES
of my heart began beating loudly again~
the very places I had given to
JESUS to heal
as I continued to
PRESS FORWARD
in
HIS PROMISES.
And I remember thinking,
“JESUS, where are YOU?”
What made it even more confusingwas what had happened
THE DAY BEFORE.
My home had been filled with women gathered together
to talk about JESUS.
Oh,
the
LIGHT had been bright.
The
JOY OF THE LORD
had filled the room.
The
PEACE OF GOD
had been so real.
And
HOPE
had filled our hearts because
JESUS was the reason we were there.
“For where two or three gather in MY name, there am I with them”(Matthew 18:20),
And then the next day...
it felt as if someone had turned out
THE LIGHTS.
And for a while, I sat there.
I allowed my feelings to convince me
that because I couldn't
FEEL GOD,
HE must not be there.
But there was the LIE.
Because
THE LIGHT HAD NEVER GONE OUT.
My feelings had changed.
My thoughts had changed.
My focus had changed.
But
JESUS HAD NOT CHANGED.
And there it is...
IT'S NOT ABOUT ME.
It's not about whether
I FEEL the LIGHT.
It's about whether
JESUS IS the LIGHT.
And HE is.
“I am the LIGHT of the world. Whoever follows ME will never walk in darkness,
but will have the LIGHT of life”(John 8:12).
I had become so focused on
MY HURT,
MY THOUGHTS,
MY FEELINGS
and
MY DARKNESS
that I had temporarily taken my eyes off
THE LIGHT.
But THE LIGHThad never taken HIS eyes off ME.
TRUTH
hadn't left the room because
JESUS
hadn't left my heart.
“The ONE who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world”(1 John 4:4).
And
“No weapon formed against you will succeed”(Isaiah 54:17),
The battle wasn't won because I suddenly became stronger.
The battle began changing when I remembered
WHO IS STRONGER.
I didn't need more of ME.
I needed to turn my attention back to
HIM.
And slowly,
the LIES that had been swirling through my mind
began colliding with
TRUTH.
BUT GOD.
HE reminded me:
JESUS IS STILL HERE.
JESUS IS STILL TRUTH.
JESUS IS STILL LIGHT.
JESUS IS STILL JESUS.
And the answer wasn't for me to fight harder in my own strength.
The answer was to
SUBMIT TO GOD
and
STAND IN HIS STRENGTH.
“Submit therefore to GOD. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.
Draw near to GOD and HE will draw near to you”(James 4:7–8).
There it was again.
FIRST THINGS FIRST.
Not~
Joni, get yourself together.
Not~
Joni, try harder.
Not~
Joni, produce your own JOY, PEACE and HOPE.
But,
TURN BACK TO JESUS.
Because I am not
THE LIGHT.
HE IS.
I am not
THE TRUTH.
HE IS.
I am not
THE SOURCE OF MY STRENGTH.
HE IS.
“Finally, be strong in the LORD and in HIS mighty power. Put on the full armor of GOD, so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes.”(Ephesians 6:10–11)
Notice...
BE STRONG IN THE LORD.
Not
BE STRONG IN YOURSELF.
Oh, what a difference.
That day taught me somethingI don't want to forget:
When it feels as ifsomeone has turned out the lights,
I don't have to
CREATE THE LIGHT.
I simply need to turn toward
THE LIGHT
who never went out.
Because...
IT'S NOT ABOUT ME.
It's about
JESUS.
So when darkness triesto convince you
that THE LIGHT has disappeared,
remember:
THE LIGHT IS STILL ON.
THE LIGHT IS STILL HERE.
THE LIGHT IS JESUS.
Therefore,
STAND IN HIS STRENGTH.
STAND IN HIS TRUTH.
And
"DON'T LET THE DARKNESS GET YOU DOWN"
(listen to the song below)
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