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Writer's pictureJoni

Day 21: Living Proof


I learned something about myself

that GOD wanted me to learn about myself

in the most wacky way.

As I was to share my testimony this past weekend

the preparation was daunting,

which is strange

because I know my story,

But because GOD has done so much in me

and continues to do so much in me

how do I share my UNEDITED life

so that I can PROVE that GOD is real.

And what I realized was that

I was trying to PROVE my story,

yet I didn't feel my TESTIMONY was proof enough.

How crazy does this sound, even to myself as I am writing this now.

Would they see my GOD who LOVED me when no one else did?

Would they see my JESUS who lifted me out of the pit of self condemnation?

Would they know that I was bleeding inside from a very young age

crying out for someone to see me, to hear me, to love me?

Well GOD woke me up on the morning that I was to share

and HE

had a different story for me to share.

Once again GOD created another testimony

so that HE could testify to who HE is

and HE just wanted me to SHOW UP.

So at 4am, HIS WORDS flowed through my fingers,

and what was being written

was a new story

which was more of a love letter

to me from GOD

because HE wanted HIS little girl

to know that HE LOVES her so much

that it was HIS STORY to tell.

Oh the tears flowed as I was experiencing GOD

in that moment that was so surreal.

Oh what a gift as PEACE filled my soul

as my fingers couldn't keep up to the pace of HIS WORDS that were speaking to my heart.

HE rewrote my story once again

that morning at the retreat center

as my original notes were tossed to the side.

Oh HE always has so much more that we could ever imagine

when we just SHOW UP

and are open to HIM

because you will leave

never the same.

I think I learned more about myself

as I scanned my past to share,

because I experienced HIS LOVING HAND

rewriting a messy story

that I was striving to write myself.

So in the midst of GOD changing what I had planned to share

HE had a plan that HE wanted to share

and all I had to do was to SHOW UP.

As I have strived to PROVE that my TESTIMONY is true

so that whoever hears it will know that JESUS is real,

I was going about it the wrong way.

I can’t prove my testimony.

I can't prove GOD.

I can’t prove JESUS.

I am LIVING PROOF.

I wouldn't be writing in this very moment

if

GOD wasn't real.

Oh HE is beyond real.

REAL for you.

REAL for me.

And REAL for everybody else.

I am HIS DAUGHTER.

Case Closed.

RESTORED. RENEWED. REDEEMED.

So simply true

that all I want is everyone to

just SHOW UP

to

"LOVING MY JESUS" (listen to the song below)





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