Day 21: Fearlessly Free

I had a dream,

that a PRAYER I have been PRAYING

was finally being ANSWERED in the way that I PRAYED

it would be ANSWERED.

Yet, I didn't know how to RESPOND,

 because it was too GOOD to be true.

 I was actually FEARFUL that

my heart would be BROKEN again.

Could I TRUST GOD with this GOOD ANSWER?

FEAR brought back the pain of

 the PAST BROKENNESS

as it came flooding back into my heart

But then I realized why.

It was because of the BROKENNESS,

that I have now been

LIVING IN THE PEACE OF GOD

without the ANSWER that I always wanted

because

I learned how to LIVE in the SILENCE while waiting for the ANSWER

by

"TRUSTING in the LORD with ALL my HEART and not leaning not on my own understanding...." (Proverbs 3:5-6)

and as I was

"Waiting for and confidently expecting the LORD;Being strong and letting my heart take courage;Yes, waiting for and confidently expecting the LORD" (Psalm 27:14)

and as I was

"Being joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer"

(Romans 12:12)

and

"Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead.

 I was pressing on toward the goal to win the prize for which GOD has called me heavenward in CHRIST JESUS" (Philippians 3:13-14)

and

so much more

because

I have been basically glued to my SAVIOR'S feet.

I have been

following HIM

 &

walking with HIM,

so HE became my STRONGHOLD,

my SAFE PLACE,

my place of REFUGE,

so that

HIS PEACE that transcends all understanding

continually overwhelmed me

as

HE HEALED my BROKEN HEART

and HE became my JOY. 

And now what was I to do,

as the DOOR was OPENED for me to

enter back into a place and space

that had caused such great PAIN,

but now was finally over.

I was so used to living without,

that I couldn't picture my life WITH

actually LIVING in the ANSWER that I have been PRAYING for.

GOD then took me to the sick woman in the bible,

who did everything in her power

to just touch the hem of JESUS' garment

in HOPE that she would be HEALED. 

And then her answer came as she was

IMMEDIATELY HEALED,

and then JESUS spoke to her,

"DAUGHTER your FAITH has healed you. Go IN PEACE"  (Luke 8:48).

I wonder if she was FEARFUL to take the first step as HEALED,

when all she knew was pain.

FEAR OF FREEDOM.

Have you been there?

Are you there now?

Actually,

FEARFUL of being

set FREE

and LIVING FREE

because

JESUS says to you,

"______________, your FAITH has healed you. Go IN PEACE".

Wow.

And then I woke up.

Tears are flowing as the weight of

the years of the BROKENNESS

is flowing out of me.

What WILL I do when GOD ANSWERS my PRAYER the way

 HE answered it in my dream.

Will I be FEARUL to enter back into the world

that has been so shattered.

Will I go

UNAFRAID IN HIS PEACE

because

JESUS has been

my HOPE

my PEACE

my JOY

my LOVE

through it all.

What am I really FEARFUL about?

FEAR that I will

lose my tight relationship with

 JESUS

who has walked with me and has never stopped

Wow.

There it is.

JESUS isn't just a crutch who you use when things are BROKEN.

JESUS IS ALWAYS

because

JESUS WAS ALWAYS

because

JESUS WILL ALWAYS BE JESUS

in GOOD times and in not~so~good times.

JESUS IS my FOREVER FRIEND

who I NEED ALWAYS,

because

 LIFE WITHOUT JESUS WITHOUT JESUS IS A LIFE WITHOUT.

So what will I do with this next SECOND.

Continue

TRUSTING IN THE LORD

and

WAITING ON THE LORD

and

PRAYING TO THE LORD

as I continue

PRESSING FORWARD with JESUS

and

LIVING IN

HIS PEACE

&

HIS HOPE

&

HIS JOY

because of

HIS FOREVER LOVE

that is ALWAYS PRESENT

in GOOD times and in not-so-good times.

And just because

GOD may ANSWER my PRAYER in the way I want HIM to ANSWER it,

and

because GOD may ANSWER your PRAYER in the way that you want HIM to ANSWER it

doesn't mean that

we stop

WALKING

and

FOLLOWING

and

and TRUSTING

and WAITING

and PRAYING

with JESUS

because

JESUS came to

LIVE EVERY SECOND

with us,

because a LIFE WITHOUT JESUS IS A LIFE WITHOUT.

I would have never met JESUS

if I never was so BROKEN in the past,

and if I never reached out and

TOUCHED the hem of HIS garment

to hear the words,

"DAUGHTER your FAITH has healed you. Go in PEACE".

And I haven't stopped GOING IN PEACE

and will never stop GOING IN PEACE. 

I thank GOD for the dream,

reminding me that

I can

LIVE FEARLESSLY FREE

no matter how HE ANSWERS my PRAYERS

because

JESUS IS ALWAYS THE ANSWER

and has ALWAYS BEEN THE ANSWER

because

"THERE WAS JESUS"*

and HE WILL ALWAYS BE.

*(listen to the song below)