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  • Writer's pictureJoni

Day 17: Perfect


As I am preparing my testimony to share this weekend,

it seems silly that I have to prepare anything

because I know my story,

so why do I have to go back

to the time when I didn't know JESUS~

as that was a time I didn't know the me

who GOD created me to be.

It saddens me still

that I didn't really know GOD when I actually thought that I did know HIM.

I would visit HIM at church on Sundays

and I would stare at JESUS on the cross

and listen to the words

and then take communion

and leave

and go about my day

and my week

and I would be the same

and do it again the next week.

Why didn't I really know GOD?

I was afraid of GOD

because HE was watching me.

Yikes!

If HE can see all that I am doing

and HE IS GOD

I better not let HIM see what I am doing

because

HE is PERFECTLY GOOD.

And if HE knew me

HE would know that I am not PERFECTLY GOOD,

so what if I tried to be PERFECT

then maybe I wouldn't be afraid of GOD

and maybe not only GOD would see me as GOOD

but so would everyone else.

But that backfired because

PERFECTIONISM is a mirage

no matter how hard you strive to touch it

because you will always fall short

and you can never ever

meet the demands of PERFECTIONISM

that you put on yourself and that others may put on you.

So as I travel back to my church days

FEARFUL of a GOD who would judge me

because others judged me too,

and I think what if they only knew me.

They would know that I was just a little girl

who wanted to be LOVED

just like every one one of us.

Well

PERFECTIONISM got me there,

but not my PERFECTIONISM

but my SAVIOR JESUS

who is the PERFECT sacrifice

that was necessary to wear our imperfections

because why would a GOD

who perfectly knitted each one of us in our mother's womb as

"fearfully & wonderfully made" (Psalm 139:14)

create something that HE doesn't want to be be born?

Thank YOU GOD

for knowing me so well

that you are watching me

and when YOU see me

YOU see PERFECTION

because your SON covers me

and now I know why I have to go back to those days

I didn't really know YOU or YOUR SON

because

I now know

that I am

"fearfully & wonderfully made"

and because of JESUS

I will never forget

and may you never forget

that you are

&

"I AM LOVED" (listen to the song below)





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