• joni

Day 33: Up


I have to admit

that my mornings~

that I used to look forward to

to just sit and be still

with God

to experience

what He had for me~

have become

a dreaded have to.

Is it because I have been depending on

myself to write something?

Have I lost my focus to why I write?

Oh how I miss the days when

my heart and fingers would just connect

and I would be blown away by

what would flow through them.

But

right now I am in

a desert time~

a dry time.

I believe God is here

I believe Jesus is my Savior

I know I have the Holy Spirit in me

Yet I feel nothing.

But feeling is not believing

& the feelings can overtake me

& I can believe in them,

and then what?

Does that mean that there is no God, Jesus or Holy Spirit? Sounds crazy,

but that is what it feels like.

Where are you God?

Where are you Jesus?

Where are you Holy Spirit?

I want more of you.

I want to feel you.

If I recognize You are there, does that mean that You are?

Have you ever felt like this~

Discouraged

Lost

Confused~

even though you know

The Truth that has set you free?

David, the great Psalmist, felt this

as he cried out the words

in his down state~

"Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? "

But then

He immediately solves his own problem

as He

Looks Up~

"I will put my hope in God! I will praise Hm again--my Savior and my God!" Psalm 42

In the wait.

And again He cries

From Down~

"How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and day after day have sorrow in my heart?"

To Up~

"But I trust in Your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in Your salvation. I will sing the Lord’s praise, for He has been good to me." Psalm 13

As He waits.

As I wait

As you wait

Because

God hasn't gone anywhere.

The tomb still remains empty.

The Spirit's fire hasn't gone out.

Will you join me today

and

Fast

from those

Down moments

by

Looking Up

whether you feel it or not,

just because

He hasn't stopped

looking at You & ~

"I lift up my eyes to the mountains— where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth." Psalm 12:1-2

Weightless Log

1st Pound: Self

2nd Pound: Complaining and Blame

3rd Pound: Chaos

4th Pound: _____________

5th Pound : Judgement

6th Pound: Distractions

7th Pound: Jealousy

8th Pound: DIS

9th Pound: Procrastination

10th Pound: Fear

11th Pound: Temporary

12th Pound: Frustration

13th Pound: Anxiety

14th Pound: I Don't Wanna

15th Pound: Forsaken

16th Pound: Control

17th Pound: Meaningless

18th Pound: Unimaginable

19th Pound: Despair

20th Pound: Knowing

21st Pound: Trees

22nd Pound: Thinking Less of Self

23rd Pound: Our Clothes

24th Pound: What Was

25th Pound: _______________

26th Pound: Unwholesome Talk

27th Pound: Uncomplicated

28th Pound: Shame

29th Pound: Worry

30th Pound: The Past

31st Pound: Un-Mattered

32nd Pound: _____________

33rd Pound: Down


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